BF is leaving for France today (for those that don’t know, he’s going to climb in the Alps). He’s going to come by my work and have lunch with me before he leaves, but I already miss him. He’ll be gone for 2 weeks – so shorter than his trip to Alaska last summer.
When he went to Alaska, I was in such a mood. I was new to Vancouver and had no friends, and was feeling lonely and depressed. But I made the most of it, and kept myself busy. This time, I have friends that I can hang out with, but obviously since I spend 95% of my spare time with him, it’s still going to suck (and yeah I know, I’m totally whining).
Plus, I won’t get to talk to him at all while he’s gone, since most of the time he’ll be in the mountains. But he did pick up a Spot Messenger, so that I know that he’s safe.
Last night he picked me up from work and we ran around the city running last-minute. Then, he treated me to a delicious dinner ($40) at my favourite restaurant (Mongolie Grill). It was so yummy.
Tonight I’m going to the post office to pick up a parcel that was apparently delivered to me a few days ago. I’m not expecting anything, so I’m a little curious as to what it is. It’s probably some free junk thing I signed up for, or samples of products or something. Then I’ll have to tidy up my apartment, and pick up my sister from the ferry.
We’ll be leaving for Idaho early tomorrow morning. I want to beat the border traffic for the long weekend. Google maps says it will take 9-10 hrs. to drive from Vancouver, but some people we know said it took them 20 hours. But they were coming from the island, probably got stuck in border traffic, and I know they stopped a bunch of times, and they seem to be the type who are suuuuuper slow drivers anyway. So we’ll see what happens.
Last night, BF and I went to the grocery store. We decided on soup and grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner. I hate buying cheese. It’s so expensive, and I rarely eat it. So I wanted to buy marble cheese (that way I could use the extra it for making pizza another night). BF wanted old cheddar cheese. I HATE old cheddar, but since he doesn’t like marble, I was willing to compromise and get a small block of medium cheddar.
BF got upset and said that he doesn’t like eating cheap cheese. And that’s fine. There are some things I refuse to budge on as well (like buying expensive cheese for grilled cheese sandwiches). So we ended up going to Subway for dinner instead. Which is funny, because my $6 sub would have cost the same as a block of cheese that would have made dinner for the both of us, and pizza later on. And I’m going to have to buy that cheese anyway because I want to make pizza for us before he leaves next Thursday.
But it got me thinking about buying groceries. We talked about how living together will help us save on groceries as well. We won’t be tempted to dine out as much, because we’ll have more time to prepare meals together, instead of shuffling between our separate places.
My groceries are at least $150 less per month than his. Not that that’s a bad thing. He’s a guy, and he’s much bigger than me, so he eats more food. He also cooks a lot more meat than me (not that that’s a bad thing, I should probably eat more meat – but it’s expensive!), and buys different things. For example, he cooks with butter. I cook with soy substitute butter. He buys organic produce. I buy my produce from the Asian grocery store. He buys pork chops. I HATE pork chops. He eats a ton of yogurt. I would rather eat nothing than eat yogurt. I think it’s going to be an interesting adjustment for the both of us. And we’ll have to find regular dishes that work for us.
So BF and I talked a bit yesterday about the possibility of me moving in with him sooner than anticipated. We originally talked about moving in together at the end of this year, but we spend basically every night together as it is, so it makes sense to move in sooner. And we would save on time and gas if we didn’t have to shuffle in between my apartment and his place. Plus, we would get to spend more time together, and it would be a lot easier to get things done if I had my things at his house.
That means I would go from paying $725/month in rent to ZERO (house is mortgage-free, but he still has to put in the labour and pay for materials to renovate the basement suite). I told BF> that since I wouldn’t be paying rent, then the first thing I would do is buy a fridge for us. He currently only has a tiny fridge, and that’s something I can’t deal with. At all. The bigger the fridge, the better! And it makes sense to get one, because when it comes time to sell the house, prospective buyers will want a full-sized fridge.
I would then take the $725/month in rent that I would have paid (minus $100/month for a bus pass), and put it into my Travel Fund. Plus the $600/month I’m already contributing, and I will be flush with cash for the trip. Plus, I’ll be able to fully fund my EF and Travel EF. AND, I want to do some expensive things in Africa (that we originally didn’t have the budget for – going on a safari and going to Zanzibar!), so now I will be able to pay for the both of us to do those things.
I know some of you will probably think that it’s not fair I’m paying BF’s way to do these things, but I honestly don’t mind. I make a lot more money than him right now (as he is still training for his career – which is expensive!), so I can’t expect him to go above and beyond the $10k that we agreed upon when we decided to do this trip. Plus, once he becomes a professional, he’ll be traveling around the world all the time. And I’m treating this trip as a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Being career-minded as I am, I doubt I would take months out of my schedule to go traveling again, until I’m retired. I’ll never say never, but I know the kind of person I am, so it’s doubtful. That’s why we’re doing this now, while we’re still young and have nothing holding us down like kids or a mortgage.
So in conclusion, moving in with BF will save both of us time and money, while allowing us to reach the next step in our relationship, and see more of the world that we didn’t think was originally possible.
But, it’s all still up in the air. I could still end up moving in at the end of the year. Which would be fine, we just wouldn’t be able to do more of those things in Africa. But it has to be the right decision for our relationship first. We’ll probably talk about it some more, and then get serious with a plan when he comes back from Europe.